The Importance of Being on Time as a Muslim
“The most beloved of Allah’s servants to Him are those with the best manners.” - At-Tabarani
Have you ever heard of a ridiculous concept called MST, aka Muslim Standard Time?
It has become an accepted tradition to arrive late for invitations, and many people consider it the norm.
As busy bees, we are constantly short on time, rushing from one event to another because responsibilities, work, and kids rarely go exactly as planned.
I can certainly relate to the last-minute mishaps parents face along the way—dealing with a dirty diaper, realizing you forgot one of your kid's shoes, bottle, or pacifier, getting an urgent work call, or spilling something on your fresh outfit—yikes!
Every day, countless unforeseen circumstances arise, and while parents may sometimes be excused for tardiness, I know of families with 6-10 children who are consistently punctual and others with just 1-2 kids who are always late. So, is this truly unavoidable, or just a bad habit?
A Culture of Tardiness
Growing up, I noticed that at any Muslim or Eastern event, a few punctual attendees like myself would patiently wait at their tables while the majority trickled in 30-60 minutes late. The event itself would often start an hour or more behind schedule!
The host or master of ceremonies would profusely apologize, joking that this was the norm at these gatherings. I remember people laughing it off, saying, "Oh well, it's Eastern Time or Muslim Standard Time," and that 7 pm really meant 7:45 pm–8:00 pm, as if perpetual tardiness was an inherent cultural trait that was graciously accepted as humorous.
Even as a youngster, I found this frustrating and never accepted or condoned it. I wonder, if we call ourselves Muslims, why do we make light of something that is, in reality, poor etiquette? I used to admire the punctuality of Westerners and think how Islamic that behavior was. Eventually, I realized that punctuality is not about East or West—it’s about respecting other people’s time and being a person with good manners.
Punctuality is a Promise
Being on time shows adhab, akhlaq, and most importantly, it is a reflection of keeping one’s word. Muslims should be known for their reliability and commitment. If an invitation states 7:00 pm, then it is our duty to honor that time and not inconvenience our host.
Islam also teaches us that arriving too early for an invitation is ill-mannered as well, thus demonstrating the thoughtfulness embedded in our faith regarding a host’s preparation time.
Allah SWT says: “O you who believe! Fulfill your obligations.” [Quran 5:1]
The Prophet SAW said: "The Muslims should fulfill their conditions within what is permissible." [Abu Dawood]
Imaam An-Nawawi reported that there is a consensus amongst the scholars that whoever promises a person something that is not forbidden, he has to fulfill his promise. However, the scholars differed about the ruling of fulfilling a promise, whether it is an obligation or something desirable. The most preponderant opinion, however, is that if the promise of a person to someone else makes the latter involved in some obligations and expenses, then it becomes an obligation to fulfill the promise, but if the promise does not cause him any expenses or indulge him in some other liabilities, then it is desirable to fulfill it. Finally, it should be noted that promising someone to do something without any intention to fulfill it is a characteristic of hypocrites. The Prophet SAW, when speaking about the characteristics of hypocrites, said: "…If he promises, he breaks his promise…" [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]. Source: Islamweb.net
Breaking the Habit of Tardiness
I understand that, as parents, we often face unexpected delays. Life with children is unpredictable, and sometimes, no matter how much we prepare, we simply cannot be on time. However, consistently being late is different from occasional tardiness due to genuine circumstances. Here are some ways to ensure that lateness does not become a habit:
Set Clocks Ahead—When my children were young, I set specific clocks in my house 5-15 minutes ahead. While in the back of my mind, I knew they were fast, my kids didn't. By tricking my mind into believing that I had to follow that time, it helped us stay on schedule.
Mentally Adjust Event Times—If an invitation states 7:00 pm, I tell myself it’s at 6:30 pm to create a buffer and ensure readiness.
Account for the Unexpected—I like to leave early to accommodate unforeseen issues like traffic, last-minute bathroom breaks, and "Where is my this and where is my that?" moments with the kids.
Anticipate Others’ Delays—If I relied on someone or was carpooling, I asked them to arrive earlier than needed to prevent delays beyond my control. This is especially a good idea when you know a particular person has a habit of being late.
Prepare in Advance—I would get my family ready at least an hour before departure. Once done, my kids would play until it was time to leave. Only bathroom visits were left for last, and shoes, coats, and bags were placed by the door for easy access.
Some days, no matter how much you prepare, circumstances arise and delays occur beyond our control. The least we can do is inform the host with a quick message and a sincere apology. Allah SWT is the Best of Planners, and sometimes despite our best efforts, we are not meant to be in a particular place at a specific time.
However, habitual lateness is within our power to change. Being "fashionably late" is not fashionable—it’s inconsiderate. Everyone is busy nowadays, and respecting another person’s time is a sign of graciousness and thoughtfulness.
Being punctual is possible for everyone, even busy parents—I know this as a mom of six who is almost always on time. Perhaps if we view punctuality as a promise we make to others, rather than just showing up at a certain place and time, it will hold more significance in our lives.
Let’s be known not just as Muslims but as good Muslims who are people of our word—because in Islam, good character is of the utmost importance.
Salam, I’m Zakeeya!
I believe that making our homes a safe haven for our families, as well as being a wife and mother, brings us great blessings, contentment, and benefits to society as a whole. Since 2011, I've been dedicated to assisting Muslimas in finding tranquility in their roles, taking better care of themselves, and achieving inner peace. Our journey in this world is not an easy one, but I pray the tools and guidance I offer will help you face life's challenges with more gratitude and mindfulness. Join me as I share wifehood, motherhood, homemaking, and lifestyle solutions that make life more fulfilling for you as a woman! Read more about me here.
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